I posted the following on this blog exactly 12 years ago today - Dec 24, 2008 and have been thinking about this a lot. Enough to go onto my blog and find it. The context in which I have been thinking about it has to do with the fact that right now, it is tough to be celebrating the holidays for everybody - Jewish or not! Covid has made us either into hermits who do not want to risk gathering with friends and families or pariahs for flouting the common sense and responsible edicts to not travel and/or gather for the holidays. Christmas and other religious holidays are so much more than opportunities to gather and celebrate. They are invitations to go within and seek Spiritual meaning in our lives. In that context, I invite you to read (or re-read) this piece:
Just about a year ago, I posted the following on a blog maintained by my friend and former pastor, Robert V. Thompson. He is the author of a wonderful book called "A Voluptuous God: A Christian Heretic Speaks". The entry was titled "It's Tough Being a Jew at Christmas". I believe it is worth repeating: My youngest daughter, Carrie, now almost 27 years of age, told me this recently. She works as a kindergarten teacher in a day care center at a Presbyterian church in Deerfield. Her frame of reference was receiving a ginger bread Nativity kit as a white elephant gift at her “work” Christmas party. My oldest daughter, Lori (age 33) sent me an “instant message” this Christmas morning which proclaimed: “you don’t know how depressing it is to be Jewish on Christmas morning”. My middle daughter, Jamie (age 30) has not checked in yet. I suspect she will not complain about being Jewish on Christmas since her husband’s family is Catholic and Jamie is determined to raise their year old daughter Jewish. Jamie has plenty of opportunity to celebrate Christmas with her in-laws and their large families and it is up to her to figure out how to navigate their holiday celebrations. I personally spent many years feeling a mixture of relief and separation around not celebrating Christmas. As a child, I naturally felt “left out” and “different” because I did not celebrate Christmas. I wanted a Christmas tree like my friends had, and if not a Christmas tree, at least a Hanukkah bush to decorate. The first time I asked, I was told there is no such thing as a Hanukkah bush. A stocking filled with toys, etc was completely out of the question. As an adult, my feelings of relief revolved around not experiencing the stress that accompanies having to engage in all the hustle and bustle that seems to define Christmas. Along with that relief, however, I was aware of a strong sense of separation and envy. My sense of separation and feelings of envy were not indicative of wanting to be a Christian nor of a strong desire to celebrate Christmas. After all, I celebrated Hanukkah with my family by lighting candles and exchanging gifts. Our celebrations did not come close to the extravagance of Christmas, but we did celebrate. At some point, I realized that my feelings were actually an expression of grief - a grief that I did not have something that I truly believed in - something magical and wonderful that I thought was embodied by Christianity and the Jesus that my Christian friends worshiped. I did not (nor do I now) feel engaged in Judaism as a religion. To me, Judaism is and for a long time has been my ethnic identity and, although, I was not drawn to the practice of a specific religion, I thought this meant something was missing in my life. Quite a few years have elapsed since I deeply envied Christians their devotion to Jesus and the birth of the Messiah I am unable to accept. I spent six years attending Lake Street Church - not trying to be Christian but as a Jew who felt a very strong call to join the spiritual community that exists within the walls of that particular church. I came to know the difference between religion and spirituality. I was introduced to Jesus the mystic, rabbi, and teacher. I learned to accept the Christ that Jesus was and how he embodied the divine light that resides in each of us - a light that transcends any and all religion. I learned that I am a devout person and that the object of my devotion is my connection with God. I now focus my spiritual energy toward more deeply knowing that connection and experiencing unification with all that is - the great I AM. A few days ago I realized that Christmas was almost upon me and I personally was not feeling any sense of disconnection to the world that celebrates Christmas. This is probably the first year since being introduced to Christmas that I have not been feeling at some level that I am missing out on something wonderful because I am Jewish and don’t celebrate Christmas. Even having my adult children complain about how tough it is to be Jewish now has not been enough to cause me to agree, commiserate, or tap into the old grief I used to feel. Their complaints did prompt me to reassess the meaning of Christmas. I found that it is no longer tough for me to be a Jew at Christmas because for me Christmas is a celebration of a very well known Jewish heretic and the message he carried about the reality of God. I have been thinking about it this year, and while Christmas is tomorrow and Hanukkah began on Sunday at sundown, I really do not feel any energy around the holidays - Hanukkah or Christmas. In my personal belief system, every day is a holy day and I celebrate my connection and communion with God every chance I am able each and every day. So, in the spirit of the holiday season for those that celebrate the holidays (and the holy days), I want to wish you all a Happy Holy Day. May the peace and light of God be with you each and every day. Namaste!
No comments:
Post a Comment